[ it isn’t as late as it should be for eren— muggy weather, although humid, was actually comfortable enough to stay active after the night hours. being too late at night though, meant that most barracks had people asleep and not many to hang around to talk to. he’s been restless all day, in fact, even now. eren doesn’t question why, so, his next destination: the hole.
with nothing else to do but keep his body occupied while his thoughts ran, he deepens his burrow, makes it better to sit in without hitting his head when he forgets he’s in a hole. that, and using the dirt to dust bathe. he doesn’t particularly . . . sweat, anymore, and given a few encounters with splashes he doesn’t find the idea of a full water bath enticing. there’s a spray bottle he got? but the water has to be hot and there’s no where to warm it at this hour.
dust bath, it is.
it’s there where eren receives the message, the watching ringing close by and allowing him to pick up (just the way akira taught him, albeit still with one finger to poke at everything), fast when he reads mikleo— oh, no.
listening makes the restless rise, the breaking of the mirrors an unheard happening and sorey’s disappearance— after a moment, if not immediately, he responds. ]
[Mikleo can't help a shiver. He just... can't get past this feeling that something is missing, that something is deeply wrong, and it isn't getting better.]
Yeah. I went back to see if he was here and I had missed him. No one's seen him for days.
[He sinks down against the outside wall. There's a particularly enthusiastic cricket nearby but he can't really hear it.]
I'll talk to Nessie in the morning. Maybe...
Edited (sorry for the edit, the grammar has been bothering me ALL DAY.) 2019-06-04 04:44 (UTC)
[ something is wrong blares louder at the back of eren’s head, more than the abominable restlessness of the day had been. with a source, despite unknowing of it and an emotional creature by default, eren takes them as his own feelings, beyond the actual worry that’s his. on his end, he’s concerned for mikleo.
sorey, as well, but not nearly as much as his bonded. ]
You stay there. [ it isn’t far of a jog to get there— and even if it were, he’d book it. ] Are there any other mirrors the same way?
[ eren’s gives a soft bah that melds with a disgruntled sound after mikleo says that first half, but no words come of it— he’ll give continuation once he gets there. he knows he’s not fine? why the fuck u lyin . . . but, eren understands that. he does bravado quite a few times when he feels pressured when he’s not fine at all. sometimes, he wins oscars. other times, he’s just honest to god actually the finest* among the rest.
*i mean he’s the craziest when i say this. you have to be crazy when you’re the only one out of, like, six, immediately going to attack a 60 meter giant because you held a grudge for five years. ]
I want to. [ firm, but not scolding or brash. so don’t!!!! you don’t have to!!! with him, sir. brisk winds hit whatever speakers are on the watch as a rhythmic swish brushes against it. he’s almost there.
a few broken. ] . . . I wonder if they’re missing, too.
[He's not surprised by the scoff or the vehemence but he doesn't argue. A Bond is a partnership. Maybe he ought to tell Eren a little more about his world, about Sorey. It's needed to understand Mikleo at least and they're still so new to each other.]
They might be. I haven't asked. ... I didn't even see what time it is, is it seriously almost midnight?
[He rests his chin on his arms and knees. Eren will easily spot him outside the building, looking silvery-blue beneath the moons. Though he's composed, that restlessness remains beneath the surface, and it's paired with a deep old sadness.]
[ if he’s looking at the sky correctly. might be more, might be less, but eren’s voice eventually shuts off abruptly. in turn, movements and shadows come to greet mikleo first, followed by a rather dusty eren. he left in bit of a rush, but at least he isn’t grimy. he could see the various array of mirrors in the complex, the fractures of broken ones in their midst. quietly, he shuffles beside him until his back is against the wall and slides down to his height, shoulder to shoulder (mostly; eren’s still two heads taller than him), tongue seeming to wet his lips briefly and smack them together as if absently tasting something, all while he glances at the seraph and lingers.
he feels his heart want to sink in unison, but it tempts to beat just as fast as it’s been all day. ]
We’ll figure out what happened. [ if they can have peace of mind rather than worry, it would already help— but he’s cautious. at the same time he doesn’t want to give false promises, his rationale is pulling blanks. people don’t disappear like that. going past the walls was heavily guarded, and witches with tracking spells would’ve surely found something. even a turnskin’s nose (or his own developing tongue).
reaching to place a firm hand on the seraph’s shoulder, eren’s own slump. he didn’t have to share a bit of emotion to know that sorey meant a lot to him. but it’s . . . weird, though, and after a moment of silence something occurs to him. ] . . . He could’ve gone back.
[Mikleo doesn't have the chance to respond. Eren's there, felt before he's seen, which is a rather new sensation. It reminds him of the palpable distance between himself and his vessel when he was still helping Shepherds. Some part of him is still a little surprised by movement in the darkness but it's soon chased by a sad smile of recognition that doesn't quite meet his eyes.
He watches Eren settle down, still quiet. When he's settled, Mikleo isn't too shy to nestle up against him. Eren might be dusty but Mikleo can't bother caring right now. The weight of Eren's hand on his shoulder is equally comforting, as Mikleo becomes aware of his magic settling, calming, spreading between them like wax melting slowly in the sun.
He closes his eyes, covers Eren's hand with his own. He'll always be a little bit colder.]
That's what I'm hoping. He wasn't hurt or I would have felt it. I woke up and he was just... gone.
[The hollowness feels less when they're like this, strangely enough.]
I thought destroying the mirrors could hurt us too. I haven't tried but it seemed like common sense to me.
What I do know is he would never leave me behind if he had a choice. And so... if he's gone, he didn't crack his own mirror.
[ which had been his suspicion since day one. this was becoming quite the mystery they had to unfold, between the heart of this world being an extinct forest that wasn’t actually always the wilde.
the chill in mikleo’s touch isn’t enough to breach the . . . sudden warmth that seeps through them both when contact is made— eren probably wouldn’t be able to explain it too well in words, but he feels . . . a lot, as if taste and smell weren’t already becoming a kaleidoscope. calm is something all too fleeting, and to steady his racing pulse, mm. it was. something peculiar.
honestly, he thought it would’ve been more evasive back when he first heard of bonds! it wasn’t for them, and it actually doesn’t perturb him as it might have under other circumstances. the exchange keeps his own buried magic at ease, and with less awkwardness than the last few times, it seems that eren’s body melds to their formation, arm more comfortable and in a near drape around the other’s shoulder. very much like you’d see a lizard basking on a heated rock. (who knew, it’d do this much good for him.) ]
I didn’t think of it hurting us— more like it’s our only way back. [ he wouldn’t have broken the one thing he came through. the same common sense through different paths. ]
[Mikleo hums thoughtfully. He doesn't seem to mind Eren draping on him like this, though he's pushed Zaveid and Sorey both off his shoulders before. He's just short enough that tall people like to use him as an armrest. But this-- this is different, less like someone subtly making fun of him and more like cuddling into a heated blanket. It's the kind of encouragement he needs right now, even if he hasn't come out and said it.]
That could be true, too. It's definitely some kind of gateway, but... I think the mirror is part of why we're Witches and Monsters instead of our normal selves. It's just a theory, though-- I don't really have anything to back that up.
[He'd rather talk about theories and history and mathematics than the fact that he is sorely missing his best friend right now.]
It's like when you look into a crooked mirror and your image is distorted. That's what this reminds me of.
[He's silent for a minute after that, and as the stars twinkle above and that damn cricket drones on, he finds himself slipping a little. He resists that, tries to pull himself back to the present. He can't remember when he last ate or slept. It doesn't really matter at all.]
... Before I came here and found Sorey, the last time I saw him was almost a hundred years ago. His life as a human has almost certainly ended.
[He hugs himself even as he's curled up against Eren, lavender eyes distant and half-open.]
When he wakes up from the magical sleep he's in, he won't remember anything about his previous life. He'll be reborn as a seraph, like me, but it could take a thousand-- even a hundred thousand years. He might never wake up at all.
That's why I--
[His voice cracks unexpectedly. He pauses, tries again, his voice softer.]
That's why I watch over him. At least... he got to be himself for a little while.
[ he feels mikleo coil into himself and finds his arm doing the same. a little less of a drape now and something firmer, actually more akin to pulling him into a hug at his side.
truth pours from the seraph’s lips, and as his voice cracks, eren could feel his own throat tightening by dulled, but still bonded empathy. it occurs to him that mikleo was from a different timeline than sorey, much like eren was compared to his captain. except . . . there just aren’t these feelings in the way. eren knows that when he returns, his countdown is more likely to resume. he’ll die in five years. he doesn’t know what’s worse— if there’s a returning possibility and be happy for it, or be completely distraught knowing they won’t remember anything about you. it’s the same as death.
death is not and never will be avoidable. a sigh, quiet, is pulled from his nose. ]
You too. [ eren might not catch any romantic tones with ease, but he knows there’s something strong and meaningful there, whether it be a friendship, a familial bond or something more. it was a time where mikleo could enjoy his company, too and just be. you know, mikleo and sorey. ] You got to stay with him the way you know him. Live every second. There’re no regrets that way when [ he gestures with his free hand ] a page flips.
[ because that happens eventually, whether it was by your own hand or by the wind’s. ]
[Mikleo welcomes the tightening grip. He's cold and hungry and exhausted, too much so to put up a fight even for the sake of his pride. Pushing Eren away won't change or obscure the truth, and Mikleo isn't the type to bury his head in the sand either.]
We'll see each other again. I have to-- I believe that, I do, I just... miss him.
[He falls silent. After a moment the reason becomes fairly obvious: Mikleo sniffles surreptitiously. If he can get away with cuddling into Eren's chest then he absolutely will because he's just so done with everything.]
Five Lords, it's not like I'm immortal or anything. [A delicate pause. The wryness is all in his voice.] I'm too damn impatient.
[ it almost (more than almost) feels like he’s trying to hide something that’s impossible to hide now. a lingering emptiness, mild in eren’s chest but not disregardable, is acknowledged, but with the display from mikleo’s end— he manages to smile at it, small and placid.
he messes with the seraph’s hair, a large hand on top of it and rolling over white locks messily, his other arm there to steady him. and maybe trap him for a few seconds. ]
You’re forgetting why I felt restless all day. [ said with a bit of a huff of what could’ve become a chuckle, and if resistance is felt, he’ll readily let go. after a few extra seconds. you can’t hide from him??? it’s like wearing a mustache to his burrow and saying this isn’t mikleo....... this is evil mikleo. ] But I just realized why now.
[ . . . ]
I hope you see him again. It can be better than the last.
[Mikleo makes a noise of distress as his hair is suddenly attacked. He flails ineffectually, trying to push Eren's hand away, but he's trapped in Eren's hold for those few seconds. Let him cuddle in peace! Jeez! When he's finally free, he drags his hands down his hair to try to smooth it; the damage is done, though, and it's curling however the hell it wants on the back edges especially.
The glare Mikleo gives him is hot but it's not... sharp, exactly, more of an annoyed pout when taken with the pink dusting his cheeks and nose.]
What are you talking about?
[For once, he's the emotionally dumb one. He's been so wrapped up in himself and looking for Sorey that he hasn't been able to separate what's his and what's Eren's. He huffs at that last part, more of a sigh than a scoff. He rubs his sleeve over his eyes to catch any lingering tears; he doesn't want those.]
... Thanks. And... thank you for listening, [he murmurs, not quite meeting Eren's eyes.] Izuku's going to be so upset. I promised I'd introduce them-- they're so much alike.
[ you’re attempting a farce betrayal, he can’t let you get away with that. hand clapping mikleo’s shoulder now (and wetting his lips, doing that thing with his mouth again) eren’s scales turn a tint deeper at what he sees (eren’s endeared), hears (the thank you) and what he savors (???). once returning his hands to his lap, eren lets his head dip back against the wall and hums in concession. he’s met him at the stables when they were under house arrest, but he did want to get to know him better. ]
He’s a great guy.
[ and he knows sorey is!! after a pause, now, eren’s lips remain tepidly curved. ]
. . . I’ve been feeling what you’re feeling. Some of it. On top of everything— you’re hungry. [ pause. ] But you’re a little better now.
[ unless it’s eren that’s uplifting things, or if he’s feeling better, or. emotions are complicated, but he simplifies. eren . . . feels content, if mikleo’s face is less upset than it was. he had the right to be upset, but. he’s keeping to his word, and he’s here. as any concerned friend would, eren doesn’t want to see him down. ]
[With that assault over, Mikleo is still not inclined to actually move. And so he sighs and rests his head against the warm shoulder he was smothered with earlier.
... Only to sit up again when Eren brings that up.]
Oh no. Ugh, I'm sorry. [Shit. That's right. He'd completely forgotten about that part of the Bond. Mikleo drags his hands down his face in frustration.] I forgot-- I don't remember the last time I ate. I didn't realize you could feel that in addition to everything else.
[Poor Eren. He's probably been going crazy all day. Mikleo is going to need to make it up to him.
His tone is wry. It's rare for him to be so freaking undone but this place has tested him daily.]
[ the drape that had been over mikleo’s shoulders earlier is now reemerging as a sideways embrace, following a hushed sound past his pointed teeth— a not-so-hardy-laugh that shares in his exhaustion. ]
I could taste it, too.
[ not hunger, but nervousness, a different sort of taste (that came when mikleo’s face turned another shade, but he has yet to see the pattern) . . . never mind that he actually just said taste and meant it, with an added tone that implied the question you too, right?.
i mean, he’s tasting him as they speak. ozone when there was no rain in sight, and the faint sweetness of confection that he probably made up to 24 hours ago. well. not that it actually is taste, but it’s the closest thing to it. the physical contact even, isn’t only from the bond itself. it certainly plays a tremendous roll in wanting to, but. he’s being a receptive lizard and not entirely realizing it. ]
[Mikleo turns his head to look at Eren, brow furrowed in confusion.] Taste? What do you mean? I don't... taste anything? [If he concentrates for a moment, he can kind of separate his emotions. There's some fondness that he thinks might be from Eren. No taste.
But he's reminded of something.]
I read once that snakes can taste the air, and that's why they stick their tongues out all the time. Maybe it's like that.
[ you bet ur ice booty it’s fondness. that, and certain comfort in his presence.
and just as he speaks, without meaning to be on cue or anything, is what. he’s been doing with his tongue since the moment he sat down. it slides across his lips, goes back in, and adjusts like he would after taking a drop of juice to sample. ]
It . . . Doesn’t bother me. Not all of it. [ the only thing he has a problem with is the aggression, and ferocity, and blips of concern may seem to pop up where emotion is concerned. but being subjected to change not so much, once they happen. when it’s happening is where it sort of. even he panics a little. ] Just takes some getting used to.
[ you don’t know how many times he’s cut his tongue, lips, gums, all on himself already? until he’s adjusted the way he rests is jaws, and even then he’s forgetful. ]
[Mikleo watches him do this and he can connect the dots. He's a little embarrassed by how closely he watches that tongue, so he looks at Eren's eyes instead. Hopefully he's not blushing too much.]
That's good at least. [His expression softens.] I know it's not the same as what you could do before, but you can protect people like this. Like you protected me in the dream.
[He can't help his curiosity. He reaches up and pokes harmlessly at the corner of Eren's mouth.]
... And I've said it before, but... regardless of what dragons are on my world, I'm not afraid of you at all. Whatever happens.
[ new thing is, beyond tame emotional sharing, he can taste your pheromones from here. eren’s own expression seems to relent, because it’s true. he’d use the new ability to continue doing what he did— maybe that’s why not too much has changed. especially when there’s a possible way back that certainly needs some looking into. there wasn’t a time in the day he didn’t think about the duties he left on hold.
eren displays his scale colors with deep saturation even before his mouth is touched— something a little more primal wants to show the seraph that he isn’t wildly angry, or territorial, or exceedingly happy, but moreso that he’s the most colorful of dragons, what could be translated into likeness, but . . . not exactly (the earliest stages of wanting to show off, it seems).
that’s what eren decides to label it as, at least. simple and what makes the most sense to him. ]
Hey— [ he says, with some surprise at the poke, and without thinking, there went his tongue again, a sharper smell of rain and human filling his nostrils and spreading across his tastebuds. it’s sort of crazy. when he smiles at him again, it’s a little tapped, in good humor. he almost doesn’t know what to say, but for a moment . . . with eyes like two blue embers, and lips that curl, his feelings say thank you. they say i’m glad. he’ll fight with him until he couldn’t, until it’s time to part, but until then, he won’t lose focus. he’ll care for what grounds him and plant what he must to rise. and that’s what burns in eren jaeger’s heart right now.
a melting pot of warmth, protection, responsibility and more. also, “this taste/smell is nice” sort of feeling. ]
Let’s get you something to eat.
[ eren has plans . . . it involves making potato stew. the only thing he ever watched his mother make. rising to his feet, eren holds out his arm to lift mikleo up. ]
[Mikleo's eyes flicker to the technicolor scales happening over Eren's skin. He's curious but mostly amused, and as he pulls his hand away, he gently runs his fingernails over Eren's neck. Then he catches himself and looks elsewhere, at least until he's trapped by those big eyes and a mysterious smile.
Mikleo can feel that fondness and gratitude as much as he can see it. The heat rises to his cheeks more persistently. Everything about the way Eren looks at him feels like being swept up into a hug. Mikleo is terribly fond of him too, enough that his breath catches and his heart thumps awkwardly in his chest in a rhythm he can't name.]
R-- right.
[Still, he takes that hand and stands up... though he doesn't let go right away. Shyly, hesitantly, he twines their fingers together.]
... If you come back with me, I can feed both of us.
[He's not interested in sleeping in an empty house again. He's done it for eighty years but the silence is honestly worse than the feeling of losing something important.]
[ he’s held hands with people, he has. historia, to get memory triggers, mikasa, when she’d sit at his bedside, and armin when they were kids— he’d walk with his fingers curling into his palm and chattering about how shitty bullies are, comforting him with valiant words as the blond would dry tears at the corners of his eyes. that was . . . a really long time ago. yet, he isn’t quick to let the hold slide away on its own now when their fingers go tangled. in fact, eren’s digits curve back a moment or so after the contact is made, the same sort of responsive crook expressive on his lips and welcoming.
he doesn’t mind it, even though a small part of him felt the oddest hint of nostalgia— like, “wow, i only watched x when i was nine”. it was different this time though, there was no end result he was looking for beyond . . . wanting to be around him, which was a contrasting way to go about it, he never really felt the need to extend his contact more than something brief. there was no time or space for the thought to bud, until a bond had made some wiggle room for it.
a pause, and he adds while they walk, feeling warm tumbles in his middle that’s nothing short of contented. ]
I’m already ahead of you. [ he knows mikleo has an entire cottage to himself now, and he remembers a short bit of insight on his solitude. he wasn’t about to leave him alone, even if he had to move his hole. those were the smallest of his problems. ] You just won’t be cooking alone.
[Eren doesn't pull away from the contact, which is somehow a miracle after the way Mikleo's been clinging to him since he got here. It... makes Mikleo happy. The Eren he'd met was-- struggling, wanting to reach out, not always knowing how. He's been through so much. But just in these few weeks, these little meetings, Mikleo's seen the difference.
He ducks his head and the shy smile with it, and gives the brunet's hand a reassuring squeeze. He's sad and still a bit wiggly inside from earlier, but having someone left to ground him helps so much. This isn't just for Eren, it's for Mikleo too, who lets his emotions simmer beneath the surface until it's too late to do anything but regret. He's... trying to be better about that. He really is.]
Oh? You're going to help me?
[His lips curl, eyes sparkling once more.]
Well then, Chef Eren, what are we making tonight? I probably have the ingredients, I've been stocking the pantry since I got the house.
[ yes, he’s going to help you. he almost has half the worry to say not we, me, you need rest, but mikleo knows his limits. he’s just as free and does what he wants. or, eren would like him to feel such. his fingers twine further with the squeeze, satisfied the the mutual contentment. but “chef eren” is hilarious, and he huffs quietly before his words, sounding much like “hah”, although his his expression doesn’t add up. he’s only willing to try, with a little extra confidence because he and the 104th would do it all the time when they had to camp out— ]
Potato leek stew. [ it’s actually bland af because they didn’t have condiments readily available on paradis for a really long time, and therefore doesn’t know how to use them, but, he is trying his sincere best. ] And— whatever tastes good with potato?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
with nothing else to do but keep his body occupied while his thoughts ran, he deepens his burrow, makes it better to sit in without hitting his head when he forgets he’s in a hole. that, and using the dirt to dust bathe. he doesn’t particularly . . . sweat, anymore, and given a few encounters with splashes he doesn’t find the idea of a full water bath enticing. there’s a spray bottle he got? but the water has to be hot and there’s no where to warm it at this hour.
dust bath, it is.
it’s there where eren receives the message, the watching ringing close by and allowing him to pick up (just the way akira taught him, albeit still with one finger to poke at everything), fast when he reads mikleo— oh, no.
listening makes the restless rise, the breaking of the mirrors an unheard happening and sorey’s disappearance— after a moment, if not immediately, he responds. ]
Is that where you are now?
no subject
Yeah. I went back to see if he was here and I had missed him. No one's seen him for days.
[He sinks down against the outside wall. There's a particularly enthusiastic cricket nearby but he can't really hear it.]
I'll talk to Nessie in the morning. Maybe...
no subject
sorey, as well, but not nearly as much as his bonded. ]
You stay there. [ it isn’t far of a jog to get there— and even if it were, he’d book it. ] Are there any other mirrors the same way?
no subject
[He lets out a deep breath. Something in his heart is trembling like a tiny bird in a storm and he's been ignoring it the whole day.
He's probably just hungry.]
There are a few, but I'm not sure who they belong to. Sorey showed me his mirror a while back, that's the only reason I know.
no subject
*i mean he’s the craziest when i say this. you have to be crazy when you’re the only one out of, like, six, immediately going to attack a 60 meter giant because you held a grudge for five years. ]
I want to. [ firm, but not scolding or brash. so don’t!!!! you don’t have to!!! with him, sir. brisk winds hit whatever speakers are on the watch as a rhythmic swish brushes against it. he’s almost there.
a few broken. ] . . . I wonder if they’re missing, too.
no subject
[He's not surprised by the scoff or the vehemence but he doesn't argue. A Bond is a partnership. Maybe he ought to tell Eren a little more about his world, about Sorey. It's needed to understand Mikleo at least and they're still so new to each other.]
They might be. I haven't asked. ... I didn't even see what time it is, is it seriously almost midnight?
[He rests his chin on his arms and knees. Eren will easily spot him outside the building, looking silvery-blue beneath the moons. Though he's composed, that restlessness remains beneath the surface, and it's paired with a deep old sadness.]
no subject
[ if he’s looking at the sky correctly. might be more, might be less, but eren’s voice eventually shuts off abruptly. in turn, movements and shadows come to greet mikleo first, followed by a rather dusty eren. he left in bit of a rush, but at least he isn’t grimy. he could see the various array of mirrors in the complex, the fractures of broken ones in their midst. quietly, he shuffles beside him until his back is against the wall and slides down to his height, shoulder to shoulder (mostly; eren’s still two heads taller than him), tongue seeming to wet his lips briefly and smack them together as if absently tasting something, all while he glances at the seraph and lingers.
he feels his heart want to sink in unison, but it tempts to beat just as fast as it’s been all day. ]
We’ll figure out what happened. [ if they can have peace of mind rather than worry, it would already help— but he’s cautious. at the same time he doesn’t want to give false promises, his rationale is pulling blanks. people don’t disappear like that. going past the walls was heavily guarded, and witches with tracking spells would’ve surely found something. even a turnskin’s nose (or his own developing tongue).
reaching to place a firm hand on the seraph’s shoulder, eren’s own slump. he didn’t have to share a bit of emotion to know that sorey meant a lot to him. but it’s . . . weird, though, and after a moment of silence something occurs to him. ] . . . He could’ve gone back.
no subject
He watches Eren settle down, still quiet. When he's settled, Mikleo isn't too shy to nestle up against him. Eren might be dusty but Mikleo can't bother caring right now. The weight of Eren's hand on his shoulder is equally comforting, as Mikleo becomes aware of his magic settling, calming, spreading between them like wax melting slowly in the sun.
He closes his eyes, covers Eren's hand with his own. He'll always be a little bit colder.]
That's what I'm hoping. He wasn't hurt or I would have felt it. I woke up and he was just... gone.
[The hollowness feels less when they're like this, strangely enough.]
I thought destroying the mirrors could hurt us too. I haven't tried but it seemed like common sense to me.
What I do know is he would never leave me behind if he had a choice. And so... if he's gone, he didn't crack his own mirror.
no subject
[ which had been his suspicion since day one. this was becoming quite the mystery they had to unfold, between the heart of this world being an extinct forest that wasn’t actually always the wilde.
the chill in mikleo’s touch isn’t enough to breach the . . . sudden warmth that seeps through them both when contact is made— eren probably wouldn’t be able to explain it too well in words, but he feels . . . a lot, as if taste and smell weren’t already becoming a kaleidoscope. calm is something all too fleeting, and to steady his racing pulse, mm. it was. something peculiar.
honestly, he thought it would’ve been more evasive back when he first heard of bonds! it wasn’t for them, and it actually doesn’t perturb him as it might have under other circumstances. the exchange keeps his own buried magic at ease, and with less awkwardness than the last few times, it seems that eren’s body melds to their formation, arm more comfortable and in a near drape around the other’s shoulder. very much like you’d see a lizard basking on a heated rock. (who knew, it’d do this much good for him.) ]
I didn’t think of it hurting us— more like it’s our only way back. [ he wouldn’t have broken the one thing he came through. the same common sense through different paths. ]
no subject
That could be true, too. It's definitely some kind of gateway, but... I think the mirror is part of why we're Witches and Monsters instead of our normal selves. It's just a theory, though-- I don't really have anything to back that up.
[He'd rather talk about theories and history and mathematics than the fact that he is sorely missing his best friend right now.]
It's like when you look into a crooked mirror and your image is distorted. That's what this reminds me of.
[He's silent for a minute after that, and as the stars twinkle above and that damn cricket drones on, he finds himself slipping a little. He resists that, tries to pull himself back to the present. He can't remember when he last ate or slept. It doesn't really matter at all.]
... Before I came here and found Sorey, the last time I saw him was almost a hundred years ago. His life as a human has almost certainly ended.
[He hugs himself even as he's curled up against Eren, lavender eyes distant and half-open.]
When he wakes up from the magical sleep he's in, he won't remember anything about his previous life. He'll be reborn as a seraph, like me, but it could take a thousand-- even a hundred thousand years. He might never wake up at all.
That's why I--
[His voice cracks unexpectedly. He pauses, tries again, his voice softer.]
That's why I watch over him. At least... he got to be himself for a little while.
no subject
truth pours from the seraph’s lips, and as his voice cracks, eren could feel his own throat tightening by dulled, but still bonded empathy. it occurs to him that mikleo was from a different timeline than sorey, much like eren was compared to his captain. except . . . there just aren’t these feelings in the way. eren knows that when he returns, his countdown is more likely to resume. he’ll die in five years. he doesn’t know what’s worse— if there’s a returning possibility and be happy for it, or be completely distraught knowing they won’t remember anything about you. it’s the same as death.
death is not and never will be avoidable. a sigh, quiet, is pulled from his nose. ]
You too. [ eren might not catch any romantic tones with ease, but he knows there’s something strong and meaningful there, whether it be a friendship, a familial bond or something more. it was a time where mikleo could enjoy his company, too and just be. you know, mikleo and sorey. ] You got to stay with him the way you know him. Live every second. There’re no regrets that way when [ he gestures with his free hand ] a page flips.
[ because that happens eventually, whether it was by your own hand or by the wind’s. ]
no subject
We'll see each other again. I have to-- I believe that, I do, I just... miss him.
[He falls silent. After a moment the reason becomes fairly obvious: Mikleo sniffles surreptitiously. If he can get away with cuddling into Eren's chest then he absolutely will because he's just so done with everything.]
Five Lords, it's not like I'm immortal or anything. [A delicate pause. The wryness is all in his voice.] I'm too damn impatient.
no subject
he messes with the seraph’s hair, a large hand on top of it and rolling over white locks messily, his other arm there to steady him. and maybe trap him for a few seconds. ]
You’re forgetting why I felt restless all day. [ said with a bit of a huff of what could’ve become a chuckle, and if resistance is felt, he’ll readily let go. after a few extra seconds. you can’t hide from him??? it’s like wearing a mustache to his burrow and saying this isn’t mikleo....... this is evil mikleo. ] But I just realized why now.
[ . . . ]
I hope you see him again. It can be better than the last.
no subject
The glare Mikleo gives him is hot but it's not... sharp, exactly, more of an annoyed pout when taken with the pink dusting his cheeks and nose.]
What are you talking about?
[For once, he's the emotionally dumb one. He's been so wrapped up in himself and looking for Sorey that he hasn't been able to separate what's his and what's Eren's. He huffs at that last part, more of a sigh than a scoff. He rubs his sleeve over his eyes to catch any lingering tears; he doesn't want those.]
... Thanks. And... thank you for listening, [he murmurs, not quite meeting Eren's eyes.] Izuku's going to be so upset. I promised I'd introduce them-- they're so much alike.
no subject
He’s a great guy.
[ and he knows sorey is!! after a pause, now, eren’s lips remain tepidly curved. ]
. . . I’ve been feeling what you’re feeling. Some of it. On top of everything— you’re hungry. [ pause. ] But you’re a little better now.
[ unless it’s eren that’s uplifting things, or if he’s feeling better, or. emotions are complicated, but he simplifies. eren . . . feels content, if mikleo’s face is less upset than it was. he had the right to be upset, but. he’s keeping to his word, and he’s here. as any concerned friend would, eren doesn’t want to see him down. ]
no subject
... Only to sit up again when Eren brings that up.]
Oh no. Ugh, I'm sorry. [Shit. That's right. He'd completely forgotten about that part of the Bond. Mikleo drags his hands down his face in frustration.] I forgot-- I don't remember the last time I ate. I didn't realize you could feel that in addition to everything else.
[Poor Eren. He's probably been going crazy all day. Mikleo is going to need to make it up to him.
His tone is wry. It's rare for him to be so freaking undone but this place has tested him daily.]
Well, it's official. I'm a mess.
no subject
I could taste it, too.
[ not hunger, but nervousness, a different sort of taste (that came when mikleo’s face turned another shade, but he has yet to see the pattern) . . . never mind that he actually just said taste and meant it, with an added tone that implied the question you too, right?.
i mean, he’s tasting him as they speak. ozone when there was no rain in sight, and the faint sweetness of confection that he probably made up to 24 hours ago. well. not that it actually is taste, but it’s the closest thing to it. the physical contact even, isn’t only from the bond itself. it certainly plays a tremendous roll in wanting to, but. he’s being a receptive lizard and not entirely realizing it. ]
no subject
But he's reminded of something.]
I read once that snakes can taste the air, and that's why they stick their tongues out all the time. Maybe it's like that.
no subject
and just as he speaks, without meaning to be on cue or anything, is what. he’s been doing with his tongue since the moment he sat down. it slides across his lips, goes back in, and adjusts like he would after taking a drop of juice to sample. ]
It . . . Doesn’t bother me. Not all of it. [ the only thing he has a problem with is the aggression, and ferocity, and blips of concern may seem to pop up where emotion is concerned. but being subjected to change not so much, once they happen. when it’s happening is where it sort of. even he panics a little. ] Just takes some getting used to.
[ you don’t know how many times he’s cut his tongue, lips, gums, all on himself already? until he’s adjusted the way he rests is jaws, and even then he’s forgetful. ]
no subject
That's good at least. [His expression softens.] I know it's not the same as what you could do before, but you can protect people like this. Like you protected me in the dream.
[He can't help his curiosity. He reaches up and pokes harmlessly at the corner of Eren's mouth.]
... And I've said it before, but... regardless of what dragons are on my world, I'm not afraid of you at all. Whatever happens.
no subject
eren displays his scale colors with deep saturation even before his mouth is touched— something a little more primal wants to show the seraph that he isn’t wildly angry, or territorial, or exceedingly happy, but moreso that he’s the most colorful of dragons, what could be translated into likeness, but . . . not exactly (the earliest stages of wanting to show off, it seems).
that’s what eren decides to label it as, at least. simple and what makes the most sense to him. ]
Hey— [ he says, with some surprise at the poke, and without thinking, there went his tongue again, a sharper smell of rain and human filling his nostrils and spreading across his tastebuds. it’s sort of crazy. when he smiles at him again, it’s a little tapped, in good humor. he almost doesn’t know what to say, but for a moment . . . with eyes like two blue embers, and lips that curl, his feelings say thank you. they say i’m glad. he’ll fight with him until he couldn’t, until it’s time to part, but until then, he won’t lose focus. he’ll care for what grounds him and plant what he must to rise. and that’s what burns in eren jaeger’s heart right now.
a melting pot of warmth, protection, responsibility and more. also, “this taste/smell is nice” sort of feeling. ]
Let’s get you something to eat.
[ eren has plans . . . it involves making potato stew. the only thing he ever watched his mother make. rising to his feet, eren holds out his arm to lift mikleo up. ]
no subject
Mikleo can feel that fondness and gratitude as much as he can see it. The heat rises to his cheeks more persistently. Everything about the way Eren looks at him feels like being swept up into a hug. Mikleo is terribly fond of him too, enough that his breath catches and his heart thumps awkwardly in his chest in a rhythm he can't name.]
R-- right.
[Still, he takes that hand and stands up... though he doesn't let go right away. Shyly, hesitantly, he twines their fingers together.]
... If you come back with me, I can feed both of us.
[He's not interested in sleeping in an empty house again. He's done it for eighty years but the silence is honestly worse than the feeling of losing something important.]
no subject
he doesn’t mind it, even though a small part of him felt the oddest hint of nostalgia— like, “wow, i only watched x when i was nine”. it was different this time though, there was no end result he was looking for beyond . . . wanting to be around him, which was a contrasting way to go about it, he never really felt the need to extend his contact more than something brief. there was no time or space for the thought to bud, until a bond had made some wiggle room for it.
a pause, and he adds while they walk, feeling warm tumbles in his middle that’s nothing short of contented. ]
I’m already ahead of you. [ he knows mikleo has an entire cottage to himself now, and he remembers a short bit of insight on his solitude. he wasn’t about to leave him alone, even if he had to move his hole. those were the smallest of his problems. ] You just won’t be cooking alone.
no subject
He ducks his head and the shy smile with it, and gives the brunet's hand a reassuring squeeze. He's sad and still a bit wiggly inside from earlier, but having someone left to ground him helps so much. This isn't just for Eren, it's for Mikleo too, who lets his emotions simmer beneath the surface until it's too late to do anything but regret. He's... trying to be better about that. He really is.]
Oh? You're going to help me?
[His lips curl, eyes sparkling once more.]
Well then, Chef Eren, what are we making tonight? I probably have the ingredients, I've been stocking the pantry since I got the house.
no subject
Potato leek stew. [ it’s actually bland af because they didn’t have condiments readily available on paradis for a really long time, and therefore doesn’t know how to use them, but, he is trying his sincere best. ] And— whatever tastes good with potato?
[ ALL HE’s EVER KNOWN ARE POTATOES ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)