[ eren: here use my knife lizard brain: you’re not crazy enough to take it anyway eren: what lizard brain: what
and that’s what happened in his head. it’s hard to find anything completely dry when their summer is mighty humid. they’ll think of something, though. as eren’s prickliness dips down to shallow heights, he returns with sticks of various sizes in his arms. there might be a few stray leaves in the middle that have fallen and dried out, but it’s rare when everything is green.
he spares elliot a passing glance, glossing over the stripped coon and approving of it. clean and quick. now they just need a fire. ]
I’m gonna need the knife, I think. [ pause. ] Good work. [ he kneels down to begin placing the bark strategically, taking the driest chip he’s found to start the embers off with that. there’s a stick he could use to rub at it— the knife, too. there’s a trick. but. he stops to pick up the wood chip and stare.
he inhales, cheeks puffing out to hold the breath, then blows it out until he has no more air to offer. round two, perhaps? maybe it’s a short breath he needs, and it has to come from somewhere in his chest. nothing the first time, neither the second or third.
the fourth, he breathes out so hard he chokes on himself. ]
[ He turns and looks at Eren when he returns, noting the bits of kindle he managed to retrieve. Even if there's still a few stray leaves, Elliot isn't bothered by it. Not like he would've done much better, in a humid forest like this.
Hearing Eren approve of his skinning work makes him relax a little. He didn't completely botch everything. So Eren will get a little smile out of him. ] Thanks. [He'll give him back his knife with ease. It doesn't matter if Eren needs the knife or not, he ain't dumb enough to keep a knife from a knife-hoarding dragon.
He continues cleaning the pelts and hanging them to dry out on a branch, eyeing Eren set up the fire. At first it seems normal to what Elliot knew about building a campfire. But then Eren starts...just blowing on it. Which um, okay. that's weird. He's pretty sure you don't blow until you actually start creating sparks. So if Eren glanced over, Elliot sure had a look of confusion on his face.
It takes a few more times before it finally clicks what he's trying to do. Dragons breath fire. He probably felt an impulse to do that. It's almost endearing when he realizes that, and---
Oh, now he's choking. Whoops.
Elliot will get up from his work station to kneel down next to Eren, hand patting his back to help soothe that choking.]
Your breaths are too shallow. You need to breathe out from your diaphragm.
[He slides his hand to the front of Eren, putting it over his diaphragm to indicate where he means. He may not be a dragon, but he was a musician. And if musicians are trained in one thing, it's proper breathing techniques]
[ wait until you hear him say that it was out of pure, unadulterated curiosity than actual impulse. the chokes are brief and is better soothed by clearing his throat from any scraping brought about by dryness, but. hands help, too.
eren’s eyes are wide with attention as he follows, with question at first, what elliot was doing, starting with a glance at the hand to his chest and traveling up.
without breaking eye contact, he gives it a go. no fire, but there’s significant strain to his diaphragm when he breathes in and out. sharp, like he’d do when he had to do something complicated with maneuvering gear. it’s been years since he’s even touched his. ]
[He'll keep his hand on Eren's diaphragm, watching and feeling the other's breathing technique. Funny, Eren doesn't seem to be a stranger to the breathing technique, just rusty. ]
A little slower...you don't want to pull a muscle you haven't used in awhile.
[He walks him through it a few more times, it becoming clear that there's no fire yet.]
Hmmm...maybe your fire breath hasn't shown up yet. Though I'd probably practice for when it does, few times a day.
[ eren mumble-grunts at first, before his voice speaks up clear. ]
Worth trying. [ he’ll just nod and— go for the knife again, fixing the chips up and using the blade to cut them into thinner pieces. they’ll just have to do it the usual way, unless there was a spell for that, but elliot was relatively new. he wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t. even though there’s still some sort of . .. tension, here.
eren tries to talk to him again, at least, voice considerably low with his attention to sparking a flame. ]
[Elliot will pull back a little, sitting far enough away that he won't get any sparks on him. He could try a fire spell, but there was no guarantee it would work. Water came easier to him, and he hadn't gotten fire down yet.]
I know dragons breath fire?
Other than that, not really. But I play flutes, so I know how to blow a lot without hurting yourself. Figure it's the same principal.
[ that made more sense than thinking “you train dragons or breath abilities”, but— whatever musicians do other than playing string instruments of sorts is lost on him. the more you learn . . . ]
It’s a good way to start.
[ he’ll admit that, and— he will probably be practicing daily now, when he does get his breath sac growing in. with attention more towards starting the fire now, a silence begins to coat them, only nature chirping or croaking to provide background noise beyond the rapid shifting of a blade against wood.
and when it’s too quiet, it begins to bother even eren. luckily, the sparks come and he scrambles to spread it among the leaves, blowing to keep the lights alive and catch against the wood. perfect. the coon’s bed is ready. ]
You said you didn’t want me thinking something about you earlier. What was it?
[Yeah alas, his only previous interact with dragons before Eren was dragons trying to kill him. But then again, flute players can be just as deadly -- may this world never have to deal with the calamity named Mint.
He gives a little nod and brief smile before he pulls away and gets back to treating the coon pelts. It's just a little more washing before he can finish hanging it all to dry on the branch. He doesn't talk, not really knowing what to say and instead letting the silence linger.
When then fire is ready he'll bring the skinned raccoon body over for the fire, offering it to Eren to cook. He'd cook it if Eren didn't know how, but his grilling skills were....well, less than stunning.
But oh...Eren brought that up. He pauses for a moment, thinking back on that moment and also hesitating as to what to say. He sits down by the fire. ]
...That I was being naive and weak.
I had instructors that'd rip into me for choices like that unless I made it clear I had thought every angle through. Guess it got me in the habit of defending my choices around soldier types.
. . . I'm not your instructor and I'm not a soldier here.
[ he's not going to chew him out, especially when it wasn't about killing animals, or lacking survival skills— he just didn't want to leave a few kids motherless, as incoherent as it could be at a philosophical standpoint, but he's just. not here to argue about that, there's no reason to.
he's observed elliot enough. after a pause, eren's voice cracks the silence together with the fire gaining life, and while he does that— prepares the coon, skewers it, and places it about the fire on his makeshift grill of sticks. easy. ]
Just someone who needs to get back home. Every second counts. [ eren's brows furrow, but not into slants of irritation as earlier— they're reminiscent of worry (although he's no longer worrying that this is the case, but, feelings). ] If you don't want to be responsible for orphans, that's enough of an answer. You know how to hold your own out here.
Hearing half of those things felt like I wasted my time. Time I gave my heart into.
[ or that it was just taken for granted, which, would probably irk just about anyone on the spot. it doesn't seem like a big deal, and perhaps it wasn't— but the anchor that brings down eren's words is heavy and trying to convey the sincerity of his feelings without bombarding the other with, well. detail bombs that would make any night end kind of heavy. ]
I'm just not the kind of person who could afford that.
[He listens to that answer, trying to envision it from Eren's point of view. He thought Elliot was telling him that he had wasted his time out here? Is that why he got so irritated? ]
...Sorry. I didn't mean to make it sound like you were wasting your time.
[That much was true, it was more about taking responsibility for his own actions, making sure his own soft choice didn't hurt the rest of the mission.
But unfortunately for Eren, Elliot isn't naive. There is something...off about his words. ]
But why...do you make it sound like you're on a tighter timetable than the rest of us? We all need to get back home too, you know.
the fire speaks for them at that second, cracks and crumbles, a mesh of color that gleams off his scales and makes charcoal black seem like gold. his eyes stay glued to the flames, and while he isn’t as upset as he could be— he’s far more serious than any other emotion. it was duty that called him, and he was done running from it years ago when he asked for death instead. death didn’t come because he couldn’t die then, or now.
(not until they were f̧̟̬̳͇͓̑͋̊́̈́͒r̛̰̩͕̜͙̦̅̈́̓̚̚è͙̜̻͕͕͍͐̓̑̋̆ẹ̡͕͕̺̩̇̀̂̓̾̕). ]
You have a life to go back to. Hopefully it’s a long one. [ if there are no accidents in the way. eren takes a stray stick and prods at the fire’s burning wood to give it more feed. ] I do too, but it has a date stamp. I need to do everything I can before then.
[ the more he stays here, the more it’s prolonged. sure, but— that isn’t the point. it runs deeper. ]
It doesn’t matter if time stopped for me here. There’s no proof it stopped back home.
[Elliot is lost for words for a moment. He's not sure what he was expecting when he asked that question, but he feels like he shouldn't be surprised. He has a time limit when he returns home? And yet he wants to go back home so badly even if the time limit doesn't matter here? That's...
It sounds so ... familiar. It makes his stomach twist. The silence before he speaks up is heavy and lasting. ]
Y-You're not...looking to die once you finish everything, are you?
[The question is quiet, almost timid, but it's not his usual nerves. It comes from a spot of memories, painful and sad, yet not ones he's ever dare erase.]
[ thats is a good reaction. the flames still whisper between fizzles and the occasional falling piece of wood that finds the pit they’ve created. ]
I don’t want to. [ if thats what he’s asking, but it’s awfully honest. no one simply looked to die, but— maybe if that were in his plans, he would, there’s no telling. ] I don’t know what’ll happen during— I just know that I need to do something before it’s imminent.
[The question eliminated one worry, that Eren was a deathseeker like those he's encountered before. But where one worry goes, another comes up. Eren didn't want to die, but he had a time limit...was it some kind of terminal illness?
There's a childish impulse to say that maybe the Coven would have a cure. But he knows that's childish. Magic wasn't limitedless, some things can't be cured. Just like his mother's illness.
[ almost idly, the tongue flicks; more to catch the scent of meat being cooked, beginning to lose thought in the action and carefully flipping the carcass’s position. the back of his mind wanders for a second, at the thought of the rarely cooked animal would taste any good— maybe that’s something to test for another day. ]
I don’t have my powers. None of the veteran witches could find any traces beyond . . . Not having magic. [ it’s only a theory, but— it’s the most positive theory he has of it. he doesn’t feel weak, he doesn’t have nosebleeds, he’s not getting any more memories sans the ones he already has, and. no titan. ] If I don’t have it, I’m not tied to it.
[That made a strange amount of sense. Elliot's come across a number of strange powers. Some of which would come with some pretty rough setbacks. Eren's sounded very rough, if that setback as a shortened lifespan. It was a setback he didn't know what he could do about it.
It does put things into context though]
...That explains why you seem so accepting about being a dragon, huh. Most of the other "monsters" I've met have been pretty unhappy about it.
[ he was trading one giant monster for another, and adding some extra time for him to think on his own, to boot. his scales don’t bother him now, they only did when they were growing in— the teeth were bothersome when he wanted to close his mouth normally and ends up cutting himself, leaving the inside of his mouth almost sore.
he could no longer regenerate, but prices were prices. he could only truly hope that it’s true, that when they return, so will their abilities, and gone with this one. ]
It’s not too different from what I had, anyway.
[ . . . sans being scaly, but he’d been dehumanized by the greater populous for so long. ]
Must've been some ability if turning into a dragon is "not too different"...
[He curious of course. But it's one of those things where he's not sure if he's allowed to ask about it. If it was something that was enough to shorten his lifespan, it couldn't have been very pleasant.]
But I could see why you'd see that as a small price. [...] For what it's worth, I think your scales look cool.
[It's a remark to mostly lighten the mood. He knows how heavy it's gotten, and he doesn't want to put too much pressure on Eren to share what must be a touchy subject]
[ he probably only wouldn’t say something more out of possible irrelevance, or thinking it isn’t too important here— but he sees elliot’s Look from the corner of his eye as he pokes at the golden side of the carcass, picking at a piece that isn’t cooked, but, it’s been in front of the fire enough to eat. one piece for him, one for elliot, which he holds out.
the remark is cute, actually, and it earns a small smile if anything. attempt accepted, even if they were a pain to grow (literally). ]
Thanks. [ it’s not that much of a touchy subject anyway— it was a fact. ] It’s a shifting ability. It’s name is the Attack Titan.
[Food! He'll accept the piece of meat with a thank you. He blows on the food a little to make sure it's not too hot and then takes a bite. It's good, a hunk of unseasoned meat roasted from a raccoon which is far from a delicacy, but still good all things considered.
But oh, looks like he is getting an answer.]
Attack Titan....[he turns into an "attack titan"? He doesn't know what a titan is but..] Was it something big?
Fifteen meters. [ meat will always be good, no matter where it comes from— don't say it, i know what you're thinking. ] It's a giant, made for close combat.
[ hah, you know, actually. eren doesn’t seem all too surprised by machines. ]
It’s more like controlling a giant than turning into one. [ it’s just easier to explain that way. ] The flesh builds around you, until you’re at the nape.
Machines are probably the same way.
[ . . . that’s an evolutionary thought he hopes will never come to warfare, they have enough giants. ]
...Ah. Yeah. The pilot is usually in the chest cavity and it doesn't have to rebuild each time, but sounds like a similar principle.
[Why he doesn't sound upset by this found similarity, he doesn't sound happy about it either. And why would he be? His world changed the day soldats and divine knights entered the picture. And even if he had some fondness for Valimar, he wouldn't say it was for the better. For any of them. ]
I don't recommend letting any engineers studying your attack titan up close.
[ mm. MMM. let’s just. yeah, about that. eren’s expression is one that almost seems to want to roll his eyes, and in the end, simply hands his head in unfortunate agreement. ]
There won’t be anymore titans to study. [ soon. no one to inherit them, or turn into them, either. he just had to think that out, and plenty grateful for the extra time he has here at something of a standstill for him to get ahead.
silence comes once more, soft this time and nestled with the cracks of their fire and cooking raccoon. eren pulls larger pieces away from the stake, unhurt by the heat that snaps under and around it. elliot might just have to be careful— once it’s in his hands, or close to them, it’s really hot.
which brings him here, after much consideration. ]
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lizard brain: you’re not crazy enough to take it anyway
eren: what
lizard brain: what
and that’s what happened in his head. it’s hard to find anything completely dry when their summer is mighty humid. they’ll think of something, though. as eren’s prickliness dips down to shallow heights, he returns with sticks of various sizes in his arms. there might be a few stray leaves in the middle that have fallen and dried out, but it’s rare when everything is green.
he spares elliot a passing glance, glossing over the stripped coon and approving of it. clean and quick. now they just need a fire. ]
I’m gonna need the knife, I think. [ pause. ] Good work. [ he kneels down to begin placing the bark strategically, taking the driest chip he’s found to start the embers off with that. there’s a stick he could use to rub at it— the knife, too. there’s a trick. but. he stops to pick up the wood chip and stare.
he inhales, cheeks puffing out to hold the breath, then blows it out until he has no more air to offer. round two, perhaps? maybe it’s a short breath he needs, and it has to come from somewhere in his chest. nothing the first time, neither the second or third.
the fourth, he breathes out so hard he chokes on himself. ]
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Hearing Eren approve of his skinning work makes him relax a little. He didn't completely botch everything. So Eren will get a little smile out of him. ] Thanks. [He'll give him back his knife with ease. It doesn't matter if Eren needs the knife or not, he ain't dumb enough to keep a knife from a knife-hoarding dragon.
He continues cleaning the pelts and hanging them to dry out on a branch, eyeing Eren set up the fire. At first it seems normal to what Elliot knew about building a campfire. But then Eren starts...just blowing on it. Which um, okay. that's weird. He's pretty sure you don't blow until you actually start creating sparks. So if Eren glanced over, Elliot sure had a look of confusion on his face.
It takes a few more times before it finally clicks what he's trying to do. Dragons breath fire. He probably felt an impulse to do that. It's almost endearing when he realizes that, and---
Oh, now he's choking. Whoops.
Elliot will get up from his work station to kneel down next to Eren, hand patting his back to help soothe that choking.]
Your breaths are too shallow. You need to breathe out from your diaphragm.
[He slides his hand to the front of Eren, putting it over his diaphragm to indicate where he means. He may not be a dragon, but he was a musician. And if musicians are trained in one thing, it's proper breathing techniques]
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eren’s eyes are wide with attention as he follows, with question at first, what elliot was doing, starting with a glance at the hand to his chest and traveling up.
without breaking eye contact, he gives it a go. no fire, but there’s significant strain to his diaphragm when he breathes in and out. sharp, like he’d do when he had to do something complicated with maneuvering gear. it’s been years since he’s even touched his. ]
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A little slower...you don't want to pull a muscle you haven't used in awhile.
[He walks him through it a few more times, it becoming clear that there's no fire yet.]
Hmmm...maybe your fire breath hasn't shown up yet. Though I'd probably practice for when it does, few times a day.
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Worth trying. [ he’ll just nod and— go for the knife again, fixing the chips up and using the blade to cut them into thinner pieces. they’ll just have to do it the usual way, unless there was a spell for that, but elliot was relatively new. he wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t. even though there’s still some sort of . .. tension, here.
eren tries to talk to him again, at least, voice considerably low with his attention to sparking a flame. ]
You know about breath powers?
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I know dragons breath fire?
Other than that, not really. But I play flutes, so I know how to blow a lot without hurting yourself. Figure it's the same principal.
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It’s a good way to start.
[ he’ll admit that, and— he will probably be practicing daily now, when he does get his breath sac growing in. with attention more towards starting the fire now, a silence begins to coat them, only nature chirping or croaking to provide background noise beyond the rapid shifting of a blade against wood.
and when it’s too quiet, it begins to bother even eren. luckily, the sparks come and he scrambles to spread it among the leaves, blowing to keep the lights alive and catch against the wood. perfect. the coon’s bed is ready. ]
You said you didn’t want me thinking something about you earlier. What was it?
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He gives a little nod and brief smile before he pulls away and gets back to treating the coon pelts. It's just a little more washing before he can finish hanging it all to dry on the branch. He doesn't talk, not really knowing what to say and instead letting the silence linger.
When then fire is ready he'll bring the skinned raccoon body over for the fire, offering it to Eren to cook. He'd cook it if Eren didn't know how, but his grilling skills were....well, less than stunning.
But oh...Eren brought that up. He pauses for a moment, thinking back on that moment and also hesitating as to what to say. He sits down by the fire. ]
...That I was being naive and weak.
I had instructors that'd rip into me for choices like that unless I made it clear I had thought every angle through. Guess it got me in the habit of defending my choices around soldier types.
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[ he's not going to chew him out, especially when it wasn't about killing animals, or lacking survival skills— he just didn't want to leave a few kids motherless, as incoherent as it could be at a philosophical standpoint, but he's just. not here to argue about that, there's no reason to.
he's observed elliot enough. after a pause, eren's voice cracks the silence together with the fire gaining life, and while he does that— prepares the coon, skewers it, and places it about the fire on his makeshift grill of sticks. easy. ]
Just someone who needs to get back home. Every second counts. [ eren's brows furrow, but not into slants of irritation as earlier— they're reminiscent of worry (although he's no longer worrying that this is the case, but, feelings). ] If you don't want to be responsible for orphans, that's enough of an answer. You know how to hold your own out here.
Hearing half of those things felt like I wasted my time. Time I gave my heart into.
[ or that it was just taken for granted, which, would probably irk just about anyone on the spot. it doesn't seem like a big deal, and perhaps it wasn't— but the anchor that brings down eren's words is heavy and trying to convey the sincerity of his feelings without bombarding the other with, well. detail bombs that would make any night end kind of heavy. ]
I'm just not the kind of person who could afford that.
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...Sorry. I didn't mean to make it sound like you were wasting your time.
[That much was true, it was more about taking responsibility for his own actions, making sure his own soft choice didn't hurt the rest of the mission.
But unfortunately for Eren, Elliot isn't naive. There is something...off about his words. ]
But why...do you make it sound like you're on a tighter timetable than the rest of us? We all need to get back home too, you know.
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the fire speaks for them at that second, cracks and crumbles, a mesh of color that gleams off his scales and makes charcoal black seem like gold. his eyes stay glued to the flames, and while he isn’t as upset as he could be— he’s far more serious than any other emotion. it was duty that called him, and he was done running from it years ago when he asked for death instead. death didn’t come because he couldn’t die then, or now.
(not until they were f̧̟̬̳͇͓̑͋̊́̈́͒r̛̰̩͕̜͙̦̅̈́̓̚̚è͙̜̻͕͕͍͐̓̑̋̆ẹ̡͕͕̺̩̇̀̂̓̾̕). ]
You have a life to go back to. Hopefully it’s a long one. [ if there are no accidents in the way. eren takes a stray stick and prods at the fire’s burning wood to give it more feed. ] I do too, but it has a date stamp. I need to do everything I can before then.
[ the more he stays here, the more it’s prolonged. sure, but— that isn’t the point. it runs deeper. ]
It doesn’t matter if time stopped for me here. There’s no proof it stopped back home.
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That's...
[Elliot is lost for words for a moment. He's not sure what he was expecting when he asked that question, but he feels like he shouldn't be surprised. He has a time limit when he returns home? And yet he wants to go back home so badly even if the time limit doesn't matter here? That's...
It sounds so ... familiar. It makes his stomach twist. The silence before he speaks up is heavy and lasting. ]
Y-You're not...looking to die once you finish everything, are you?
[The question is quiet, almost timid, but it's not his usual nerves. It comes from a spot of memories, painful and sad, yet not ones he's ever dare erase.]
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I don’t want to. [ if thats what he’s asking, but it’s awfully honest. no one simply looked to die, but— maybe if that were in his plans, he would, there’s no telling. ] I don’t know what’ll happen during— I just know that I need to do something before it’s imminent.
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[The question eliminated one worry, that Eren was a deathseeker like those he's encountered before. But where one worry goes, another comes up. Eren didn't want to die, but he had a time limit...was it some kind of terminal illness?
There's a childish impulse to say that maybe the Coven would have a cure. But he knows that's childish. Magic wasn't limitedless, some things can't be cured. Just like his mother's illness.
And yet...]
You said...the clock's been stopped here?
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I don’t have my powers. None of the veteran witches could find any traces beyond . . . Not having magic. [ it’s only a theory, but— it’s the most positive theory he has of it. he doesn’t feel weak, he doesn’t have nosebleeds, he’s not getting any more memories sans the ones he already has, and. no titan. ] If I don’t have it, I’m not tied to it.
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[That made a strange amount of sense. Elliot's come across a number of strange powers. Some of which would come with some pretty rough setbacks. Eren's sounded very rough, if that setback as a shortened lifespan. It was a setback he didn't know what he could do about it.
It does put things into context though]
...That explains why you seem so accepting about being a dragon, huh. Most of the other "monsters" I've met have been pretty unhappy about it.
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[ he was trading one giant monster for another, and adding some extra time for him to think on his own, to boot. his scales don’t bother him now, they only did when they were growing in— the teeth were bothersome when he wanted to close his mouth normally and ends up cutting himself, leaving the inside of his mouth almost sore.
he could no longer regenerate, but prices were prices. he could only truly hope that it’s true, that when they return, so will their abilities, and gone with this one. ]
It’s not too different from what I had, anyway.
[ . . . sans being scaly, but he’d been dehumanized by the greater populous for so long. ]
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[He curious of course. But it's one of those things where he's not sure if he's allowed to ask about it. If it was something that was enough to shorten his lifespan, it couldn't have been very pleasant.]
But I could see why you'd see that as a small price. [...] For what it's worth, I think your scales look cool.
[It's a remark to mostly lighten the mood. He knows how heavy it's gotten, and he doesn't want to put too much pressure on Eren to share what must be a touchy subject]
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the remark is cute, actually, and it earns a small smile if anything. attempt accepted, even if they were a pain to grow (literally). ]
Thanks. [ it’s not that much of a touchy subject anyway— it was a fact. ] It’s a shifting ability. It’s name is the Attack Titan.
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But oh, looks like he is getting an answer.]
Attack Titan....[he turns into an "attack titan"? He doesn't know what a titan is but..] Was it something big?
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Wow...
I know people who use humanoid machines that are giant, but to turn into one is really new.
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It’s more like controlling a giant than turning into one. [ it’s just easier to explain that way. ] The flesh builds around you, until you’re at the nape.
Machines are probably the same way.
[ . . . that’s an evolutionary thought he hopes will never come to warfare, they have enough giants. ]
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[Why he doesn't sound upset by this found similarity, he doesn't sound happy about it either. And why would he be? His world changed the day soldats and divine knights entered the picture. And even if he had some fondness for Valimar, he wouldn't say it was for the better. For any of them. ]
I don't recommend letting any engineers studying your attack titan up close.
[Eren was right to have that hope]
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There won’t be anymore titans to study. [ soon. no one to inherit them, or turn into them, either. he just had to think that out, and plenty grateful for the extra time he has here at something of a standstill for him to get ahead.
silence comes once more, soft this time and nestled with the cracks of their fire and cooking raccoon. eren pulls larger pieces away from the stake, unhurt by the heat that snaps under and around it. elliot might just have to be careful— once it’s in his hands, or close to them, it’s really hot.
which brings him here, after much consideration. ]
Would you bond with me?
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