ic contact 💥 recollé

[usurpers]

▶️ new inbox

Comments

[fiddlestick]

[Elliot gives a little happy laugh at that. He's just so happy to see Eren's face, to see him look alright. They'd been texting, but that wasn't really the same as seeing him. ]

Oh, not exactly. There's a couple abandoned cottages near our camp, but there's not nearly enough of them for everyone.

[He's been sleeping outside, the polite person he is.]

Growing a mountain man beard?

[usurpers]

[ oh my god . . . if elliot wasn’t the only thing making him goof smile, the comment makes him rub his neck, then his prickly face. not because he wanted to but because their resources for that sort of thing weren’t really abundant, but! ]

You need to get in the zone out here. I even went hunting. [ he got like. a quail, but. it even makes sounds as he rubs his hand over it. god it’s like sandpaper. ] Promise I’ll trim it down when we get back.

[fiddlestick]

Hehe, did you! That's so cool! Some guys have been going here too. What'd you catch?

[He seems so impressed. Eren you're so manly and cool]

Not before I get a chance to feel it, okay? Though it does look pretty prickly...

[usurpers]

[ golly . . . he should hunt and bring food home more often. with a beard. he laughs a little at the prickly comment, but seems to grin. ]

You get the last call. But it . . . [ eren stop rubbing your nonexistent beard ] It feels pretty cool, I never let it get this far.

[ his dad had always been nasty annoying with facial hair and how men should wear themselves clean. recolle dad sucks at least past dad had snazzy beard game too. ]

—I got a few birds. Quails and grouse. And I almost got a moose.

[fiddlestick]

[Too bad you had to go and eat past dad, you could've had a magnificent beard by now]

Aha, you sure? Well...if you insist, I think I know just the right test to see if it's worth keeping.

[He basically just means kissing you to see it's too weird feeling, but whatever]

Wow! That's cool! Too bad about the moose though, though I did see a picture of Soleil riding one?

[usurpers]

[ is that infamous cherry red ears burning up his face or is it just the sky colors . . . anyway, eren makes something of a groaning sound through a smile that still sticks to him. ]

That’s the moose. [ he shrugs, making a face. ] It wandered into camp. I had it right in my scope, and . . . [ tongue click, followed by clapping over his face. lord, his distress when he was three seconds away from pulling the trigger. ] She went running for it.

[fiddlestick]

[And Elliot laughs at Eren's ears going red. He'll always find that cute okay]

Really? Yikes! Thank goodness you had good reflexes. [BE MORE CAREFUL SOLEIL...]

[usurpers]

Half of missing was thanks to a giant raccoon-bear.

[ he’ll just. let that sink in a pause of silence. with a mostly neutral expression. they sure are getting used to crazy things, huh. ]

[fiddlestick]

A giant....raccoon-bear?

[His owl-eyed expression says it all: da fuq is happening in Group 4]

[usurpers]

Yeah— it was some assclown’s pet? [ intense gesturing!! ] Can you believe he had the nerve to say, [ and then eren mimics the voice of some preppy barbie copy, rolling his eyes: ] “Hey, is there a reason why you, like, hate animals?” For being hungry, right? [ another mimicking mutter: “newehweh i love meat and you can go, like, hunt moose?? just not this one??” ]

I’m out here swallowing mutant fish arms and we got an off limits moose grazing around camp. [ HE GRABS THE CAMERA AND TURNS AROUND TO ZOOM IN ON A yes that is a moose ] Because it’s Mooses Christ or whatever.

[ he sounds huffy and he might be ranting, but at least it’s the kind of huffiness to sort of. laugh at. ]

[fiddlestick]

Oh dear. [His hand not holding the phone lifts up to cover his mouth as he laughs a little.] That does sound a bit ridiculous. I hope they're not planning to take it back on the bus with you guys.

[usurpers]

Y’know— I wouldn’t mind it.

[ is that . . . a sniper rifle he props up as he settles back where he was ]

On one condition.

[fiddlestick]

....[Oh boy]

Sweetie, please don't get yourself thrown off the bus over a moose. I do really wanna see you again.

[usurpers]

[ buT HONEY........ ]

They can keep the moose forever, as jerky. [ jerky hardly ever spoils!!! kind of. ] . . . He won’t be crazy enough. I’ll be back in one piece, with no moose on the bus.

[fiddlestick]

[NO HONEY. ELLIOT IS THE GREATEST GOOD YOU'LL EVER GET]

Here's hoping he won't be. Who is it anyway?

[usurpers]

[ eren pinches the bridge of his nose in thought. he’a a good team player. he’s a good . . . team player . . . ]

. . . Barney Kuma?

[ he knows everyone’s name ]

[fiddlestick]

Barney...Kuma?

[He thinks on it. That name doesn't sound familiar in the slightest.]

Can't say I've heard that name before.

[usurpers]

[ eren waves his hand flippantly, tilting the screen a bit toward the camp to get the guy probably next to the moose to give it pets. ]

Something like that. I think he bought your food once.

[ a dozen times but probably didn’t get a good look at his face eren was too busy ]

[fiddlestick]

Huh? I don't think--

[Wait, then he sees the guy on the video feed, and it clicks]

Oh! You mean Baren!

[usurpers]

Baren— . . .

[ . . . he told elliot’s best customer to eat grass

]

Gallons of juice Baren?

[fiddlestick]

That's him, yep.

[It's okay babe. He's hardly his best customer]

I don't know him well, but he's very much...an eccentric.

[usurpers]

[ he called you chef boyardee ]

. . . I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually does eat grass. [ and— now a near sheepish smile, to explain: ] When he told me to hunt moose except that one, I told him to stuff it. With grass.

[ the salt of enough to burn snail army— eren is a diva when he’s hungry and denied his meat ]

Bad mood.

[fiddlestick]

Oh, well...that probably wasn't the best way to handle things, but...

[He sighs]

He won't stop calling me "Elly". And then he texted 21 people in our group to make sure we look after his cousin.

So, I can understand the annoyance.

[Aka Elliot ain't gonna scold you, you're good]

[usurpers]

. . . I don’t call you Elly.

[ unwanted intimacy much???? this bozo??? he’ll punch him. in his mind. ]

What a spacey mother— Your sleep spells don’t work long distance either, do they?

[fiddlestick]

I know, and I really appreciate you for that.

[Legit the only people that call him that is his family. And he wants to keep it that way]

Aha, I'm afraid they don't, no.